这满世界的克莱登呀
现在满世界都是克莱登,前有钱老笔下特著名的方鸿渐,后有名头大有超越方洪渐的吴怔,再加上第一美女添砖加瓦,看样子我买个文凭也不是什么太丢人的事。就象前两天我安慰一“同志”:以后也许爱滋病菌会成为有益菌种,跟大肠杆菌一样人人必备,你不必为自己现在成为先驱而感到羞愧——也许,多少年以后,良莠参杂,而你我都已经见怪不怪了。
去年学校给每个在职老师发了个广告,威斯康辛大学海外分校学前教育专业在泰国开第9期班,欢迎大家踊跃报名。以前学校里的XX老师和XXX老师都是在那里镀的金,如今拿着烫彩的硕士文凭和一张在照相馆里戴着博士帽和绶带的照片,到处张贴说自己毕业于威斯康辛大学,广告都贴得满电线杆了,而后纷纷自己当了老板,其实那几位在过去三年内从未踏上过美国的土地。
院长狂鼓励我也去混一个,这样名头比较招摇,以我的忠心不二,也不怕我以后跳槽。学校还负担一半的费用。
我的确想去,因为学习期间每次集中汇考的时候学校给10天的有薪假期复习,其他老师累死累活替着代课没奖金。想来名校CANDIDATE用那10天去泰国玩玩也是很好滴,反正也没听说谁没拿到文凭。
之所以不去,是不想辱没了我心中仅次于博士的亚神圣头衔,尽管满世界多了去了,但每次看谁谁号称自己出自名校,与某某曾经隔了几代同窗,都叫我羡慕不已,得不到的总是心中的圣地。还有更令我景仰的“威斯康辛”。象我这样不学无术的混世魔王,就不要糟蹋了那样光辉神圣的牌匾,当然那块牌匾早已经被乱七八糟的口水淹没过了。
头两天无意遇另一麻友括号大专两年那种,以前一起通宵达旦搓麻将的那种,他很得意地告诉我,刚从北京大学企管班出来,拿了个正宗北大硕士文凭,扔出去随便检验都是纯金。“便宜!在职公务员还打折,工作经验抵学历。”我只能说,我心中的燕京大学,已经坍塌在未名湖里。
(Posted – 03/02/2004 于《草堂》)
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