躺家
2009年07月01日
1.
偶得问我:“妈妈,你是作家吗?”我说,是啊!偶得说,我的老师说你是作家。我看他的表情,显得很困惑。我说怎么了?他说,我说你是躺家。你每天躺在家里嘛!
汗。。。。。。你们瞧瞧我内形象!
我跟他讲,这个作,是写作的作,写作就是写故事,写文章。这个家,不是家里的家,是专家的家,就是干什么事干得很好的人。比方说,画家,什么是画家?他说,就是画画很好的人嘛!我说,什么是歌唱家?他说,就是唱歌很好的人嘛!
他自己发挥:我是玩家。爸爸是游戏家。爷爷是数学家。奶奶是劳动家。
貌似就一个数学家用对了啊!
2.
我跟偶得说,妈妈九月要回中国一段时间,我要回去工作。偶得说,不行!我不同意。我说,妈妈回去,不是说妈妈不爱你不要你了,是妈妈需要工作,等工作完了就回来看你好不好?我快快工作。
偶得答:不行!我不要你工作。
我的娘也!我如果有一天淡出文坛,请同志们铭记,那是因为我儿子的阻挠!
下午接到一个电话,因为讨论的某些内容儿童不宜,我就赶紧穿了鞋子走出门去。等电话结束后回来,偶得抱着我的大腿惊喜万分地说:“妈妈!你回来啦!”我很奇怪,才出去不过10分钟啊!
奶奶说,你一出门,偶得就大叫:“妈妈走了!妈妈不要我了!妈妈回中国了!然后就哭了。”
我很无奈,抱起偶得说:“妈妈怎么会不跟你说就回中国呢?你脑子怎么想的?”
他就跟失而复得一般地粘着我不放了。我上网,他就坐边上跟我絮叨。我有一句没一句地答他。
他突然咳嗽起来,我一听就是装咳。没搭理他。他索性把嘴巴伸到我脸前头咳,认真指嘴巴说:“妈妈,我咳嗽了!”我说,咳嗽你怎么不捂嘴巴?细菌会到处跑的。
他说,我就是要细菌到处跑,传染你,你生病了,就回不去中国了嘛!
我大笑着抱住他,紧紧的。小东西,开始跟我玩鬼点子了。
3.
我发现,父母是小孩的世界。
偶得被他爷爷奶奶和AUNTIE FE带了这么久,我以为他跟我们出门会不适应,结果发现他非常自然,整个旅途竟然不会想到其他人等。要离开香港了,我说,偶得,我们要回家咯,可以看到爷爷奶奶咯!偶得居然答:“我不要回家,我喜欢住酒店。我喜欢DISNEYLAND HOTEL,我喜欢SHANGRILA!"
这个拜金的小孩!
4.
跟偶得在家练杂耍,我做瑜伽的动作,将大腿搭在另一个大腿的内侧,他坐到我的腿上,然后俩人同时松手,都举平衡。他会在我的腿上摇摇晃晃,而我应着他摇晃,俩人倒是配合默契。就这个经典动作,在家里经常表演,爷爷奶奶每次都吓坏了,说别摔着!
偶得爹看到了,不屑地说,我也会。
我说,你来表演一个。
他将脚丫踩在床帮上,让偶得坐上来,俩人都松手,偶得爹还说,看!看!我“切”了一声。。。。。啥人啊!有本事你也悬空啊!
人家好不害臊地说:“我没本事。你的动作我做不了,你空档的地方,我多东西,怕把自己踩坏了。”
我咔咔咔咔。。。。。。。。
5.
迪斯尼不能穿短裤。以后切记去的人要穿牛仔裤。
我去的那天穿的是五分裤,结果满腿咬的都是蚊子包。刚开始看着淡淡的红,也不严重,谁知回来以后一周之内变成千疮百孔。奇痒难忍加发起肿块。去医院看,医生也没有什么方法。
偶得爹说,全家人去,怎么就你被咬?偶得这么嫩,都没事。
我只好说:“我招小动物喜欢啊!I M SO SWEET!”
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