分类
偶得日记

躺家

躺家

2009年07月01日

1.

偶得问我：“妈妈，你是作家吗？”我说，是啊！偶得说，我的老师说你是作家。我看他的表情，显得很困惑。我说怎么了？他说，我说你是躺家。你每天躺在家里嘛！

汗。。。。。。你们瞧瞧我内形象！

我跟他讲，这个作，是写作的作，写作就是写故事，写文章。这个家，不是家里的家，是专家的家，就是干什么事干得很好的人。比方说，画家，什么是画家？他说，就是画画很好的人嘛！我说，什么是歌唱家？他说，就是唱歌很好的人嘛！

他自己发挥：我是玩家。爸爸是游戏家。爷爷是数学家。奶奶是劳动家。

貌似就一个数学家用对了啊！

　

2.

我跟偶得说，妈妈九月要回中国一段时间，我要回去工作。偶得说，不行！我不同意。我说，妈妈回去，不是说妈妈不爱你不要你了，是妈妈需要工作，等工作完了就回来看你好不好？我快快工作。

偶得答：不行！我不要你工作。

我的娘也！我如果有一天淡出文坛，请同志们铭记，那是因为我儿子的阻挠！

下午接到一个电话，因为讨论的某些内容儿童不宜，我就赶紧穿了鞋子走出门去。等电话结束后回来，偶得抱着我的大腿惊喜万分地说：“妈妈！你回来啦！”我很奇怪，才出去不过10分钟啊！

奶奶说，你一出门，偶得就大叫：“妈妈走了！妈妈不要我了！妈妈回中国了！然后就哭了。”

我很无奈，抱起偶得说：“妈妈怎么会不跟你说就回中国呢？你脑子怎么想的？”

他就跟失而复得一般地粘着我不放了。我上网，他就坐边上跟我絮叨。我有一句没一句地答他。

他突然咳嗽起来，我一听就是装咳。没搭理他。他索性把嘴巴伸到我脸前头咳，认真指嘴巴说：“妈妈，我咳嗽了！”我说，咳嗽你怎么不捂嘴巴？细菌会到处跑的。

他说，我就是要细菌到处跑，传染你，你生病了，就回不去中国了嘛！

我大笑着抱住他，紧紧的。小东西，开始跟我玩鬼点子了。

　

3.

我发现，父母是小孩的世界。

偶得被他爷爷奶奶和AUNTIE FE带了这么久，我以为他跟我们出门会不适应，结果发现他非常自然，整个旅途竟然不会想到其他人等。要离开香港了，我说，偶得，我们要回家咯，可以看到爷爷奶奶咯！偶得居然答：“我不要回家，我喜欢住酒店。我喜欢DISNEYLAND HOTEL，我喜欢SHANGRILA!"

这个拜金的小孩！

　

4.

跟偶得在家练杂耍，我做瑜伽的动作，将大腿搭在另一个大腿的内侧，他坐到我的腿上，然后俩人同时松手，都举平衡。他会在我的腿上摇摇晃晃，而我应着他摇晃，俩人倒是配合默契。就这个经典动作，在家里经常表演，爷爷奶奶每次都吓坏了，说别摔着！

偶得爹看到了，不屑地说，我也会。

我说，你来表演一个。

他将脚丫踩在床帮上，让偶得坐上来，俩人都松手，偶得爹还说，看！看！我“切”了一声。。。。。啥人啊！有本事你也悬空啊！

人家好不害臊地说：“我没本事。你的动作我做不了，你空档的地方，我多东西，怕把自己踩坏了。”

我咔咔咔咔。。。。。。。。

　

5.

迪斯尼不能穿短裤。以后切记去的人要穿牛仔裤。

我去的那天穿的是五分裤，结果满腿咬的都是蚊子包。刚开始看着淡淡的红，也不严重，谁知回来以后一周之内变成千疮百孔。奇痒难忍加发起肿块。去医院看，医生也没有什么方法。

偶得爹说，全家人去，怎么就你被咬？偶得这么嫩，都没事。

我只好说：“我招小动物喜欢啊！I M SO SWEET!”

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