家是三个人的事
2008年03月31日
出门在外,想念偶得。
感觉自己因为别人的错误而被放逐,承受思念之苦。
经常在WEBCAM上看见儿子,蹦跳着或者唱歌,俩人隔着屏幕亲嘴儿。偶得这一向跟爸爸很亲,昨天爸爸还到处跑着找爆米花给他吃,没买着,就带了一盒煮好的玉米回来给儿子,说,没买到爆米花,买爆米花的爸爸给你吃。所以,偶得坐沙发上认真吃米花的爸爸,我跟他说话也不理。
今天儿子动个小手术,偶得爸爸一大早带他去,不一会儿就打电话来汇报说,做好了,儿子已经活蹦乱跳了,进去只几分钟。我悬着的心放下,爸爸还特地把医生割下的小CYST装在瓶子里带回来让我在屏幕上看,我说看不清,留着我回去看。爸爸说,会臭的,护士让扔。我说,放冰箱里。奶奶于是得令将偶得第一次手术的战利品冻起来留妈妈回去检阅。
抛开情感问题,在小孩的抚养与教育上,我与偶得爸爸没有任何分歧,大家都全心全意。在谈论小孩的事情的时候,两个人就是DADDY,MOMMY,还是一家人。
早上,朋友MSN我,说,告诉你一个感慨。
我说什么?
她说,老公又酒后驾车了。这次我决定给他个教训,我把家和公司的门锁都换了,不许他进门,让他滚出去。
我赞同说,以前就出过事情,怎么还不吸取教训?难道非要闹出人命吗?酒后驾车是对自己和他人生命的不负责,你是要好好整顿一下。
她的老公是个模范丈夫和父亲,只是偏好杯中物。
她说:“当时他站在门外,我让他滚蛋。女儿就在旁边,坚持说不能罚爸爸,因为爸爸是她的爸爸,只有她能罚他,要我给爸爸一个机会。”
小孩才五岁。我听了朋友的话,眼泪都要掉下来。
她说:“昨天晚上,在女儿和我的监督下,老公写了保证书,保证从此不再干危险的事了,并且车钥匙我没收半年。女儿认真跟爸爸说,这是给他的最后一次机会了!转脸又跟我说,我们要给爸爸好多次机会。因为我们是一家人。”
朋友说,那一刻我就明白了,小孩一大,两个人肯定没法分开了。小孩就会管着大人。她说,现在偶得还小,还不懂事,长大以后,他会怪你们的。
我前一向总是劝说自己要问自己的心,不要考虑小孩,问自己是不是还爱他,不爱了赶紧收拾包裹走人,不要再浪费自己的青春。
偶得的爸爸常在网上跟我絮家里的事情,小孩学了什么,一家人去了哪里,他脚气又犯了。我嘱咐他小孩不要太放纵,脚气犯是因为新鞋可能不是全皮的,换双凉鞋穿透透气,与往常的家常聊天没有任何区别。最后他的结束语总是:“你什么时候回来?”我沉默不语。
他说,我知道我错了,对不起你。但我希望你不要在我犯错误的时候丢下我不要我了,而是要帮助我,因为我们是一体的。
我还没想好,所以打算把问题暂且搁置,留给未来解决。邓小平同志真是牛啊!凡是当下无法解决的问题,咱们就先放一放,留给子孙后代去解决吧!
也许有一天,突然一切都明朗了,我也知道要去哪里。
无论如何,谢谢偶得爸爸,在我不在期间内,照顾家和小孩。
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