爱情是什么
我发现每年一到过年,我家电脑就闹放假。 去年旧手提坏了,年初二一大早,店铺刚开门我们就冲进去买了个新的。今年,这个新手提在年前就罢工了。劳工批评我说,我用东西的粗糙程度,堪比一个顽皮孩子,到我手的东西没不坏的。数码相机坏两回,旧手提修了5回,新手提也修两回了。其他东西等在此不一一例举。 在等待配件期间,我被允许暂用劳工的电脑。 没过一周,劳工电脑也被我折腾停了,不断死机,自行重启,网络也不运行。在等待修理期间,劳工严禁我触碰家里最后一抬与外界保持联系的旧手提。因为这个是我家的总备份,劳工的论文,我的剧本都放在里面。 我答应了。 可心痒难耐。上网如抽大烟,开了头就停不下来。 我每天表现极好。当着劳工的面带孩子,看电视。 劳工现在日日要早朝。 所以歇息得很早。 11点过后,偶悄悄潜进书房,打开他的宝贝电脑又开始上网。 我不信自己手气这么糟,短时间内造坏三台电脑的可能性极小。 正在网上撒欢呢,边看网页边跟导演聊天。我给他家的狗改了个富贵的名儿,由以前的NEO改成现在的添丁,又替他处理了一下感情的纷扰,出了几个损招。相聊正欢,当鼠标用的触摸屏8工作了。当场晕倒。 光见MSN上蓝色乱跳,就是点不到那个地方,也不知道人跟我说什么。 不得已半夜偷偷打他手机:“天哪!我把我家唯一的一台电脑又搞坏了!你不要跟我说话了。永别了。基本上明天起你就见不到我了。我的下场会很惨,劳工会把我暴打致残。” 他说,没关系,只要剩一口气,手指还能动,你就能继续打字。 我说,你以为呢?偶劳工第一反映就是把偶手指头给剁掉。 他于是跟我永别。 偶偷偷摸摸地匍匐进卧室,不发出一丝声响地静静躺在劳工身边,没敢出大气地睡着了。能睡就先睡一会吧!不到天亮偶就会被骂醒的。 天亮了。 劳工站床边推我。我迷糊着。 听见劳工说:“老婆,我把家里最后一台电脑也给弄坏了。鼠标不动了。” 偶眼睛都没睁开地回答:“米关系,亲爱的,咱再买新的。老婆有的是钱。” 劳工很感动!说,老婆,你比我好多了。每次你弄坏东西,我都骂你,但我弄坏了,你每次都很宽容地原谅我。 我说,因为,旧的不去新的不来。 再说,我弄坏两台,你才弄坏一台啊! 劳工亲偶一下,说,老婆真好。 皆大欢喜。 爱情是什么? 爱情吧,就是适时撒点小谎,感动死对方。 | |||||
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| Posted: 2006-02-07 10:46 |
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