MM, although your situation is a little bit hard, it is far from needing to cry much. You have health, you have an education, you have your family's love, you have your bf's love, what else do you need? all you need is to work hard and find a job, and you are on the way to support yourself and pay back the 30,000 RMB. Just take initiative, and show people your willingness to work, I am sure someone will give you a chance.
