By Anita Chang
Associated Press
Sunday, November 30, 2008
CHONGQING, China -- Nine-year-old Anna He stands quietly amid the chaos in her boarding school dorm on a Sunday night, a frenzy of little girls chattering in Chinese as they change the linens on rows of wooden beds.
Anna is an outsider here. Her parents are Chinese, but she cannot talk to her schoolmates because she grew up in the United States.
This small girl with watchful dark eyes was at the center of one of the longest custody battles in the U.S. in recent times, a high-profile seven-year dispute in Memphis marked by racial and cultural undercurrents.
On one side were Jerry and Louise Baker, a white family in suburban Memphis. On the other were the Hes, immigrants scraping by with low-paying jobs before they returned to China.
The legal fight is finally over. And a new story has started for Anna.
Last year the Tennessee Supreme Court ordered her returned to the Chinese couple and the family moved to China in February. Since then, Anna has lived in two cities and attended three schools. After her parents' marriage fell apart, she was sent to boarding school this fall and goes home on weekends.
"I really don't like living at school," Anna murmurs in English, buttoning and unbuttoning her sweater absently as the other girls flutter bedsheets in the air.
Anna was born on Jan. 28, 1999, a few months after her father was accused of sexual assault by a fellow student at the University of Memphis. Shaoqiang "Jack" He lost his scholarship and graduate student stipend, although he was ultimately found not guilty.
With very little income and no health insurance, the Hes asked an adoption agency to find a foster family until they got back on their feet. Anna went to live with the Bakers when she was less than a month old.
In June of that year, the Hes signed court papers that transferred custody of Anna to the Bakers so she could get health insurance. The Bakers eventually sought to adopt Anna, saying the Hes had abandoned her.
Anna's parents wanted her back, and the case wound through four different courts. One judge, who stripped the Hes of their parental rights, suggested the couple only wanted to keep Anna to avoid getting deported, calling Anna's natural father deceitful and the actions of her mother "calculating, almost theatrical." For five years, the courts did not allow the Hes to see Anna.
The Bakers in turn questioned the quality of life for little girls in China, where families have a traditional preference for boys.
By the time Anna returned to her Chinese parents last year, she was no longer a baby but an 8-year-old American girl. She was unable to speak or understand Chinese.
Anna's parents separated just five months after returning to their native country. Her mother, Qin Luo "Casey," took the kids from the city of Changsha, where Jack had found work, to her hometown of Chongqing in southwestern China.
The mother and children -- Anna, 8-year-old Andy and 6-year-old Avita -- now live in a simple two-bedroom apartment on the outskirts of town.
On a recent Friday night, Anna and Avita huddle in one room, dressed in matching Hello Kitty tops and whispering to each other in English on a bed strewn with a Chinese checkers board, marbles and miniature plastic figurines.
Here at home, everybody talks to Anna in English. Her brother and sister are fluent in English and Chinese. Everyone calls her "Anna," instead of her Chinese name, "He Sijia."
After nine months in China, Anna still does not speak much Chinese, a notoriously difficult language to learn. She says she can understand some things, "if it's really easy."
"At class, I never understand," she says, with her childish manner of speaking, pronouncing R's as W's. And Anna is reticent about communicating with other kids in Chinese because, "well, they never understand me."
At first, Anna says she is "scared" to answer questions about herself, but soon she's eager to talk.
"Well, I liked America. I liked to be at school. I liked math and science," she says. "I have, like, a lot of friends and I get to be with everyone that can speak English."
And what are three things she likes about China?
"Well, let me think ... well, I have made a friend but now she is gone. Her name was Sarah. That's one thing. I'm trying to think of a second thing. Second thing I like about China ... is ... well, I don't really know. I don't know. ... There's so many cars and a lot of people smoke. I really hate that."
Anna should be in the fourth grade but was placed a grade lower because of her language difficulties. She says school in China is "five times harder" than in America. She has a backpack filled with papers from her U.S. school, most marked in green ink with a perfect score.
"At school, on my report card, I always had A's, never one B," she says. "In China I maybe got too many B's and C's."
Anna hates ballet, and her favorite class is piano.
When asked about the Bakers, Anna pulls away. She rolls onto her back. She covers her face with her hands. She says she has forgotten what it was like when she moved from one family to the other, and whether she was happy or sad.
"I don't even know," she says.
At dinner in a Chinese restaurant near their home that Friday night, Avita snatches two duck drumsticks while Andy hacks at a crunchy potato dish. Anna closes her eyes and puts her hands together.
"Her teacher asked me, 'What is she doing?' I had to tell her, 'She's praying,'" Casey recalls with a laugh.
Anna says she does not miss her father, whom she has not seen since July.
"No one knows where he is. One time, this one day, maybe nighttime, he was just gone and we never seen him again. And he took away his computer," she explains.
Jack, who teaches at a tutoring center in Changsha, says that he left the family's apartment after a fight with his wife and that she took the children away.
Casey has accused her husband of infidelity, hitting her and neglecting the children. He denies the accusations.
Jack filed for divorce and said in court documents he wants custody of all three children.
"It's not my intention to really divorce her," says Jack, who calls himself a "family-oriented man." "It was to intimidate her to not move away from home with the kids without my knowledge. ... I'm still hoping that she will come back to me."
Casey sent all three kids to boarding school after her brother convinced her it would be too hard to handle them, the daily commute, the schoolwork and the household duties all by herself. She visits them at least three times a week.
"It was a hard decision," she says. "Thinking about it, I would get so upset and cry."
Like many mothers in China, Casey fills her children's time at home with lessons: piano on Friday evenings, Chinese tutoring on Saturday mornings, art on Sunday afternoons. There is no television in the apartment; instead, Casey bought a new upright piano for 15,000 yuan ($2,200).
"I feel that with the kids, I should do everything possible to give them as many education opportunities as I can," she says. "When they grow up they'll be able to get ahead."
Casey, 40, seems stretched a bit thin trying to keep up with the kids. She folds clothes laid out to dry on a space heater while trying to cajole them into picking up toys. She follows after the girls with a hairbrush, but they play with stuffed animals as if she's not there.
Casey does not work, although she says she would eventually like a job. She is supported by her brother, a successful businessman. He pays for the children's schooling -- 7,000 yuan (about $1,000) per semester per child -- and owns their apartment.
The Bakers renewed contact with Anna after her parents separated, and they call every Saturday afternoon. They send care packages filled with Anna's favorite things: stuffed animals, macaroni and cheese, chocolate.
Louise Baker wonders if it's common for young children in China to go to boarding school. In fact, many parents who can afford it send away children as young as 5 or 6 because they think a structured setting is better for education or they are simply too busy with work.
"Things have gotten really good," Baker says in a telephone interview. "At first she was real quiet, standoffish, but now she chitter-chatters a lot."
Baker won't talk about Anna's current situation. All she will say is that they're happy Casey has the children and "grateful" to her for allowing the telephone calls. They are discussing the possibility of a visit.
"We just want her to be happy and to grow up and to continue to love the Lord," Baker says, unable to hold back her tears. "We're just happy she's got the love of two families."
Anna and Avita sleep in adjoining beds on the fourth floor of a large dormitory building, sharing a room and bathroom with about 20 other girls. They are supervised by one teacher.
The children are out of bed at 6:30 a.m., back in by 8:25 p.m. The day starts with a morning run and ends with showers, three girls to a stall to speed things along. They wash their hair once a week, on Thursdays.
"I really hate living at school," Anna says. "The only good thing is going home."
Casey hopes to get enough money to send the children to an international day school in Chongqing. She expects to receive a large compensation package from the demolition of a house she owns there.
She also thinks about moving back to the U.S., although she knows it would be hard to find a good job with her limited English.
"They were born there, they're used to the lifestyle there. There's not so much pressure on them at school," she says.
On the coffee table at home is a small purple notebook pasted with messages on colorful paper from Anna's former classmates. Anna reaches for it.
"Some of them are in cursive," she points out, reading aloud. "Dear Anna, I hope you have an awesome birthday and a great time in China. I'll miss you." "Dear Anna, have a very happy birthday, I hope all your wishes come true."
After looking at more than a dozen notes, Anna turns to a blank page.
"No more," she says, matter-of-factly. "No more."
Timeline
1998
May: Shaoqiang "Jack" He travels to China for a wife, Qin Luo "Casey" He, who joins him in Memphis later.
October: A Chinese student claims Jack He tried to rape her at the University of Memphis; He is fired from university job.
Dec. 1: With little income and no relatives nearby, the Hes turn to Mid-South Christian Services to discuss options for help when their baby is born.
1999
Jan. 28: Anna Mae He is born.
Feb. 24: Foster parents Jerry and Louise Baker agree to keep Anna Mae for 90 days.
April 27: Jack He charged with sexual battery in October 1998 incident.
May 23: Jack and Casey He agree to continue temporary foster care.
June 4: Legal custody is transferred to the Bakers at Juvenile Court.
2000
May 3: Hes petition Juvenile Court for Anna Mae's return.
June 28: Referee Claudia Haltom denies the petition, citing lack of income and pending criminal charges.
2001
April 9: Hes petition to regain custody through Juvenile Court.
June 20: Bakers petition Chancery Court to adopt, citing abandonment and failure to provide financial support. Juvenile Court action on hold.
2002
Feb. 21: Jack He acquitted on the assault charge.
Sept. 23: Hes visit Anna Mae at a psychologist's office. It is the first time in almost three years they have seen her.
2004
Feb. 23-March 2: Trial before Circuit Court Judge Robert "Butch" Childers.
April 12: Final arguments before Childers.
May 12: Childers rules; terminates Hes' parental rights.
May 19: Hes appeal ruling.
2005
Feb. 16: Tennessee Court of Appeals hears arguments.
Nov. 23: Court upholds Childers' ruling. David Siegel, Hes' attorney, vows to appeal.
2006
Oct. 4: Arguments before Tennessee Supreme Court in Nashville.
2007
Jan. 23: Tennessee Supreme Court returns custody to Hes; Bakers say they have not decided whether to appeal.
June 25: U.S. Supreme Court refuses to hear the Bakers' request to review Tennessee Supreme Court ruling.
July 20: Anna leaves the Bakers' home.
July 24: Anna moves in with her parents and siblings.
2008
Feb. 9: Hes move back to China.
http://www.commercialappeal.com/news/2008/nov/30/annas-journey/贺梅在中国挣扎着去适应新生活美联社，记者：Anita Chang
星期天晚上，学校宿舍一片混乱。女孩们正在调动床位，9岁的贺梅静静地站在一旁，耳边是一阵阵她听不懂的中国话。
回中国前，同学告诉她，中国是个“奇怪”的地方。“我真的不喜欢住校。”玩弄着自己衣服上的钮扣，她用英文喃喃地说。
她的父母，回中国5个月后便分居。母亲带着她，加上8岁的弟弟及6岁的妹妹回到自己的故乡重庆，一家人住在市郊一处两卧室的公寓里。
礼拜五晚上，贺梅与妹妹在房间里扭成一团。穿着同花色的Hello Kitty的睡衣，两人以英语说着悄悄话。床上散落着象棋、弹珠和小玩具。在家里，每个人说跟她说英语。大家都以英文名字“安娜”唤她。没人叫她的中文名字——贺思家。
回中国9个月，贺梅能懂的中文依然十分有限。“我只听得懂一些最简单的……我从没听懂老师说的话。”她说。甚至连在午餐的菜里发现一只大黑虫，他都不知道如何告诉老师。她也不喜欢和同学打交道。因为“他们不了解我。”她没告诉同学美国有万圣节。“因为我不知道怎么用中文说这几个字。”她解释。
与同年龄的孩子相比，贺梅算个小个子。因为爱吃肉，她有个圆鼓鼓的肚子。小小的脸蛋，凸显了两颗大门牙。刚开始，她说有点“害怕”谈论自己。但很快地，她开始滔滔不绝。“我喜欢美国，喜欢美国学校，喜欢数学及科学课。我有很多朋友，他们都说英文。”她说。
“你最喜欢中国的三件事？”记者问。“嗯，让我想想……我有一个好朋友，她叫莎拉，但现在已经转学了……第二件事，让我想想……我不知道，我真的想不出来。这里有太多车、太多人在抽烟。很讨厌！”她说。
她认为，中国的功课比美国难了5倍。她有一个背包，装满了在美国时的学校作业。多数都用绿色的笔打上几乎是满分的成绩。“我都是得A，从没拿过B。但在中国，我好像得了太多B和C。”她说。
贺梅讨厌芭蕾课，最喜欢的是钢琴课。她说“我喜欢音乐，让我忘记不愉快。”“你有什么不愉快？”记者问。“我不喜欢学校。”她回答。“你有什么愿望？”“我希望所有人都说英文！”她笑着说。
当被问到贝克家，贺梅跑开了，在床上打滚，用手遮住自己的脸。她说自己已经不记得离开贝克家时的情景，也不记得当时是开心还是难过。“我不知道！”她说。
晚餐桌上，妹妹抓起了2根鸭腿，弟弟抢去了一盘土豆。合起双手、闭上眼，贺梅开始祷告。“刚开始，老师也好奇她在做什么。”母亲笑着回忆。
7月至今没见过父亲，贺梅说自己不想念他。“没人知道他在哪里。有一天晚上，他突然离家，还带走了计算机，然后我们就没再见过他。”她解释。
贺绍强，目前在长沙教书。他说当晚他与妻子吵架，一怒之下离家，然后妻子就把小孩带走了。关于罗秦说他不忠、暴力相向、忽略孩子，贺绍强一概否认。他后来提出了离婚诉讼，而且要争取3个孩子的监护权。“我是个爱家的人，我并不想离婚。我这样说，只是一个警告，希望她不要一声不吭就把孩子带走。我还在等他们回家。”他说。
搬到重庆后，在田纳西的贝克夫妇，每个礼拜六固定和贺梅通电话。他们好奇，这么小的孩子就读寄宿学校，是中国是否是普遍的情况？“情况已经好了许多，与她刚回中国时相比，现在她更多话了。”他们说。虽然不愿多谈贺梅的近况，但贝克夫妇很感激罗秦让他们与贺梅联络，两人现在正计划到中国探望贺梅。“我们只希望她能快乐地长大、继续爱上帝。我们很开心，她能得到两个家庭的爱。”他们说。
在宿舍4楼，贺梅和妹妹睡在相邻的两张床上，与其他约20个女孩，共享寝室与浴室，宿舍里还有社监。孩子们每天6点半起床，8点半睡觉。以晨跑展开一天，洗澡为结束，每个礼拜四洗一次头。
“我真的很讨厌住校。最快乐的是回家的时候。”贺梅说。
罗秦现在希望，在经济情况好转后，能送孩子进重庆的国际学校。她也想过，搬回美国的可能性，虽然知道自己英文不好，可能找不到工作。“孩子在美国出生，已经习惯了那里的生活，学校的压力也小些。”她说。
在客厅的茶几上，有一本紫色封面的小本子。里面贴了许多简短的留言，都是贺梅回中国前，同学写给她的。“亲爱的安娜，我希望你在中国一切快乐！我会想你的。”“亲爱的安娜，生日快乐。祝你美梦成真。”贺梅大声地念给记者听。翻了10几页，看到空白的一页，她说“没了，没了！”
[ 此贴被卡拉在12-14-2008 20:30重新编辑 ]
