YOU WERE ALWAYS ON MY MIND
晚上看电视的时候,这首歌在那部很老的电影里反复播放。女主角已经很老了,也很胖,其貌不扬。原本是部轻松的轻喜剧片,我却看得总从纸巾桶里抽面巾纸。
女人的美,你知道吗?可以跨越年龄,身材与外貌。她眼角的皱纹象潺潺的小溪,她的嘴唇因为牙齿的脱落而走形。她的双下巴,在她笑或流泪的时候,随着节奏轻轻颤抖。她的腰身,当她心爱的人拥抱她的时候,刚刚触及她宽厚的背。
影片里,她总在厨房里COOKING,或在草地上推着除草机。在COOK的时候,她快乐地举着香肠充当话筒,笨重的身体在厨房旋转,不时碰倒茶杯或桌椅。她快乐地唱歌,YOU WERE ALWAYS ON MY MIND。还有很多经典的歌,我很熟悉,却叫不出名。
每个见到她的人,都说,你让我想起我的母亲。饭菜的味道,还有你温暖的笑容。
你知道我为什么哭吗?
你说,老了,我们如果都孤单着,就将两床被合一起。
我想,前半生美丽的时光,我在快速撕扯着日历。如果日子可以象电影那样快进,也许,我会快快跳到我的暮年。
在我一个人的日子里,我会一个人在屋里唱着歌学习COOKING。有你没你,我都会慢慢享受日子,如品尝咖啡般一口一口啜着略带苦涩的甜蜜。
而老了,我会和你在一起,即便走到墓地的尽头也不担心。你会吻着我空白的牙床,将四只手交错,纠缠在一起,踩着音乐的鼓点,带着我在自家小院的空地上慢慢晃着两步。夕阳尽撒屋落,枯叶飘摇着坠落在你的头顶。我替你轻轻抹去。
我想为这首好听的歌配一幅美丽的图片,那幅图片让我一看见就想起我们可预见的幸福。
我的图库里有阿尔卑斯山,藏北风光,马尔代夫的阳光,甚至还有山区绿莹莹的冲天毛竹。这些,都是你我憧憬的地方。
我最终都不选。因为我想,到老了,你我都走不动了,既爬不上山,也下不了海,我们能力所及的,可能也就是携手在街头漫步,看行人行色匆匆,相视一笑,裹紧大衣。于是我选了这张看着略显冷清的图。属于你我的时光,正象这已经落叶的树,躯干苍老,心却年青。
你不必担心曾经有过的承诺无法实践。因为,无论你在世界的什么经纬,YOU ARE ALWAYS ON MY MIND。
*****************************************
1982: Grammy: Best Country Vocal–Male, Always On My Mind
—Willie Nelson
Maybe I didn’t love you
Quite as often as I could have
And maybe I didn’t treat you
Quite as good as I should have
If I made you feel second best
Girl I’m sorry I was blind
You were always on my mind
You were always on my mind
And maybe I didn’t hold you
All those lonely, lonely times
And I guess I never told you
I’m so happy that you’re mine
Little things I should have said and done
I just never took the time
You were always on my mind
You were always on my mind
Tell me,
Tell me that your sweet love hasn’t died
Give me, give me
One more chance to keep you satisfied
I’ll keep you satisfied
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