六六：努力是通往成功的稳当路
来源：城市快报 第07版：人物 作者：苏莉鹏 2016年03月12日
照片由长江文艺出版社提供
女作家六六每次出现在公众视野，都意味着她的作品会引来一次相应的关于社会热点问题的讨论。三年前，六六出版了一本散文集《女不强大天不容》，出乎她意料的是，这本书的销量非常好，六六从书名到内容都在阐述一个“做女人必须要强大”的道理。最近，六六又出版了一部同名的小说，之所以仍用这个书名，并非想借此前的热销为小说造势，而是身为女性的六六，在把目光转移到中年危机和女性生存的痛点后，直击当下女性面临的职场与家庭的取舍问题。
作为一名女性作家，人到中年的六六能在如今的生活中过得如此得心应手，都来源于她对“做怎样的女人”这个世界难题的彻悟和解答，生活的经历让她明白一个道理：做女人必须要强大
在小说《女不强大天不容》中，六六其实是在写一部女性的职场奋斗史。其实经济独立的观点早已获得绝大多数都市女性的认同，经济独立也成为女性生活现状的主流模式。事业是立身之本，而女性在事业上的强势却极易造成家庭关系的失衡。六六的上一部作品《宝贝》就对此问题有了初步思考，其中的家庭模式最终变成男主内女主外的“女不强大天不容”高阶模式。到散文集《女不强大天不容》，已经是一部“赤裸裸”的“女强人”的修炼手册。
这一次，六六以“疑似女权主义者”的姿态重新审视女性的人生——故事的女主角郑雨晴，除了学霸老公迫使她变得强大外，高富帅朋友太忙、孩子太小、同事只想看好戏、领导只想扔烫手山芋……她只能将为人妻、为人媳、为人母等家庭角色所千锤百炼出来的强韧心态施诸职场内外的各种社会角色中。这是压力，却也成为女性的优势。
对于女性强大的心得，其实来自六六自己的经历。作为一名女性作家，人到中年的六六能在如今的生活中过得如此得心应手，都来源于她对“做怎样的女人”这个世界难题的彻悟和解答。六六说《女不强大天不容》的书名是她自己起的，不为夺人眼球虚张声势，只是切身的体会。“你们知道我小时候最宏大的理想是什么吗？当家庭妇女！”最初，六六也是个小女人，渴望相夫教子，过简单的家庭生活，可是生活的经历让她越来越认识到一个道理：做女人必须要强大。
六六说她的蜕变经历分为四个过程：小妇人——女强人——名女人——大女人。
“现在各种魔幻、穿越题材当道，现代社会写实的作品式微，但我不会因为风口的转变而改变自己的写作路径，因为我对自己的责任认知是：记录当下，留档未来”
十几年前，六六到新加坡去打拼，刚到那边时，她经历了很多坎坷，找到的第一份工作是给一个教授当保姆，还在一家从地图上都找不到的工厂打过工，那时丢了一元钱她都会大哭一场。后来，她写的第一部电视剧《双面胶》没有拿到报酬，而且在编剧的名单上也没有出现六六的名字……这样的职场经历听起来有些不堪回首，但在六六看来是“十几年前想吃的冰淇淋，今天终于吃到了”。
六六自立自强、绝不依附他人。六六说：“我都不敢回头看曾经的足迹，我把所有不毛之地经营成锦绣繁华。”这样的“血泪史”也是幸福的一种，让六六在感叹岁月将女人酿成红酒的同时，蜕变成一个成功且成熟的大女人。
她希望通过回望和反思自己的经历来让女人明白，生活留给女人的活路很窄，在生活中，尤其是婚姻中，无论多爱，都不要放弃让自己强大，“哪怕世界再混乱，你也要保持优雅。”
六六在小说中有这样一句话：“每个女人都是海鸥，虽然笨拙，但也能飞过海洋。”在很多人眼中，六六是个成功的女性，但她说：“我的外号就叫笨笨啊！我并不是因为聪明而成功的，而是因为努力加运气。这个世界上，有诸多的路通往成功，但努力是一条稳当的路，攀顶概率最大。”
一向关注现实题材的六六说，她现在的写作已经从当初的喜欢，变为喜欢加责任。“现在各种魔幻、穿越题材当道，现代社会写实的作品式微，但我不会因为风口的转变而改变自己的写作路径，因为我对自己的责任认知是：记录当下，留档未来。”
本报记者 苏莉鹏
对话
城市快报（以下简称“快报”）：据说为了这部小说你采访了上千人，你想从这些人身上了解哪些事情？
六六：我做大量采访的目的，不是为了主人公郑雨晴这个人，而是为了了解在风云突变的移动互联网时代，每个人对“变”这个词，从茫然应对到改变甚至共舞的过程。每个人对变革的反应之不同，构成了各自生活精彩程度的不同。
快报：你认为在当下这个时代，平衡家庭和事业还是成功女性最大的挑战吗？你是怎么平衡的？
六六：女性最大的痛苦是自我斗争。比方说，我想有很多时间陪孩子成长，我又想从事喜欢的事业，我还有父母公婆要孝敬，我还有朋友要交往，每天都过得匆忙而内疚。我现在的方法是，告诉我自己，我不欠任何人的，时间是我自己的，我选择我最舒服的方式生活。让儿子实现自我管理，让他知道学习是自己的事，妈妈也有自己的事，有问题时一起商量解决，没问题各干各的。出差了把孩子托付给爹妈老公，家也是大家的事。我的平衡方法是，把掌控权交出去，乐得一身轻松。我让儿子自己管理自己，让老公夺权管家，他们说什么我都执行，干不了就请人帮忙，而且学会适度撒娇。
快报：“女强人”的“强”应该体现在哪些地方？
六六：我恰恰认为，“女强人”的“强”不是自己独当一面，而是有能力协调、分工合作。一个人的力量是有限的，能够团结众人的力量，有公允心、有赞美心、有谦让心、有担当心的人，才能真正做到强大。强大的本意是不争，不争才是最大的力争上游。你周围所有人都好了，没道理你不好。
快报：书中的主人公最后放弃了升职，选择了创业，安排这个结局你是怎么考虑的？
六六：我想把她作为当下转型期的一个人物，其实我想写的是变革中的人。转型就面临着困扰，但个人力量不能抵御进步的洪流。我恰恰觉得这是最好的时代。在过去，你很难有机会选择生活，你习惯了被领导、被指示、被布置、被教育，终于有了一个时代，你可以选择自己喜欢的事情去做，你居家也不会是失业。世界上本就没有路，一马平川，你只需策马扬鞭，不需要找一条马路。
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