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幼儿教育

教育的困惑

教育的困惑

2008年01月07日

爸爸妈妈带宝宝去购物广场，广场前，有一老叟盘坐于地，拉二胡。合肥的腊月分外寒冷，宝宝被包裹得像个圣诞礼物，而老爷爷却在寒风呼号中伸着老树枝桠般的粗糙手指在一把破琴上吱吱钮鈕。老人面前的地上扔个破烂饭盆，里面稀稀落落散着几个硬币。

说真话，他的琴声远不如我脑海中的瞎子阿炳那样的艺人精湛动听，简单一支小曲也完成得勉强，不提五音乐律，更不说余音绕梁。可我低头看看他盆中的硬币，估计到夜也就够一碗寡面。

怀中的儿子跟我闹着：“宝宝要坐摇摇晃晃，妈妈给我MONEY。”爸爸在旁边说：“那叫COIN。”

我灵机一动，问宝宝：“宝宝你看，爷爷拉琴很辛苦，一天没吃东西了很可怜，宝宝要不要把坐摇摇晃晃的钱送给爷爷吃饭呢？”

偶得看看面前的爷爷，毫不犹豫地说：“不好。”

我哭笑不得。我以为孩子秉性善良，看到如此可怜的场景，肯定痛哭流涕着就把钞票递过去了，哪里晓得，原来善良和艺术修养一样，是要从小培养的。

我只好继续开导他：“宝宝有新衣服穿，有酸奶喝，有电视看，有大房子住，可爷爷什么都没有，我们把宝宝坐摇摇晃晃的钱给爷爷吧？不然爷爷肚肚饿。”

偶得思量一会儿，依旧坚定地答：“不好。”

旁边的爹都已经扭头开笑了。爹说：“你这是损害他的利益，他心中摇摇晃晃是很重要的，他显然不肯，你如果直接给他一个硬币让他塞给爷爷，这他是肯的。”

我问：“什么是善良？善良就是心底的怜惜，知道牺牲自己的利益去照顾别人。如果无关痛痒的事情，举手之劳，那如何叫善良？”

老公不同意：“这叫慈善，不叫善良。慈善就是自己吃不完用不完，分出九牛一毛来与别人买点心安或者和平的生活环境。他如果有摇摇晃晃坐，余下的钱能给别人，就可以了，如果非让人虎口拔牙，那是不行的。善良与苛捐杂税不同，要心甘情愿才可以。强迫的善良不是真善良，这叫伪善。”

教育理念的偏差。

拉琴的老头都住手了，开始听我们夫妻的争论。一块钱而已，这对公婆为何如此计较？

我不理老公，继续做儿子的思想工作，过程冗长，情节曲折，略去不言，总之，在儿子最终含泪答应把钱给老爷爷的时候，老爷爷自己的泪都快掉下来了，估计恨不能倒给我们一块钱别难为孩子了。

儿子手里捏着一块钱，递给爷爷，爷爷双手承接着说：“好孩子，谢谢啊！祝你平安健康！”

偶得的难过只一会儿，不一会儿就又兴高采烈了。

来到摇摇晃晃前，偶得一指木马说：“要坐摇摇晃晃。”他爹开始掏口袋，我制止。大丈夫言既出，必信，行必出，必果。

提醒偶得刚才已经把钱给老爷爷了，偶得想了想，也没闹，乖乖走了。

看他在前面自己摇摇晃晃着唱歌，假装自己在颠木马的样子，我的眼泪都要掉下来了。

我自己也很困惑：善良，究其本意，应该如何？

父母与孩子都在成长，你我都不知道怎样的教育对孩子是正确的。

孩子，如果妈妈的某些行为对你未来有不好的影响，请你原谅我，因为我内心里，渴望你成为一个顶天立地的男子汉。
　

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