2007年011月11日
养儿子就为替我败坏的。
上天为什么恰巧在那个时间段给我送个孩子来?主要是看我没有胸怀世界的豪情和悲天悯人的慈善,送个孩子来消耗我的钱财。
在生儿子前,我曾经花了超过一万新币去瘦身中心减肥,买过价值6000多的按摩椅。闲哪,富裕呀,又没人帮我花,捐给贫困山区我也没那么高觉悟。
然后老天送来了偶得。
偶得跟我的钱有愁。自打有了他,我终于做到了吃苦在前,享乐在后,一分钱掰两半儿花。不掰也不行。你不知道什么时候他就给你一个天大的意外惊喜。
前两天他在家玩,突然咣当一声,循声而去,发现壮汉偶得同志把大衣橱的门给踢掉下来了。幸亏有床拦着,门斜靠在床沿,小人儿夹在门与床的中间,还笑眯眯。
奶奶把小人儿救出来,把门藏起来。
爷爷回家,从衣橱里拿衣服。奶奶问,看出有啥不同么?爷爷左右打量说,没呀?奶奶说,不觉得透气?爷爷再一看说,门呢?门被孙子给踢掉了。
爷爷第一反应:孙子砸到没有?第二反应:孩子呀,你闹的动静越来越大了。以前也就撕点纸,现在已经钻墙打洞了。家里眼见着就盛不下你了。
我家的衣橱门,到现在都敞着,不修。爷爷说,万一再弄下来,危险。现在这样,大家掏衣服都方便。
这还是小CASE。
刚买的LANCOME爽肤水,满满一大瓶,想够在中国用一年呢,结果刚用两次,昨天被儿子泼洒一地,回家,奶奶给我看底朝天的瓶儿。我那个疼呀!
奶奶说,是你不好,你觉得精贵的东西为什么不放好?他现在上天入地,哪儿不去?不错了,不是玻璃瓶子,不然弄伤他我跟你没完。
我张口结舌,连句抱怨都不敢说。
我坐地上用电脑,儿子爬沙发上,高空跳伞,他大叫着降落,一屁股坐我屏幕上,顿时一片喀嚓声。IBM原装电脑啊!打电话去问维修部,说是4000多。我啪照儿子屁股一巴掌,说小狗东西,一屁股这么贵!怎么想起来养你这个败家精!我真该把你塞回去!
跟老公哭诉,老公问,儿子屁股扎着没有?我说,你不问我手给扎着没有?男人真是没办法,自打有了孩子,那个孕育的母亲就靠边站了。我永远排在儿子之后。老公训我:是你不好,晓得他在爬沙发,你为什么不躲开?自己不注意。
我没法注意。我永远不知道下一分钟他的行踪,他即兴表演,他兴致所至,他想研究的东西,他的破坏功能每天都让我耳目一新。我除了赞叹人类的创造性毁灭性,真是不知道该如何表达我的欣喜。
我在家永远是到处花钱收拾烂摊儿,儿子这么小都会说,没关系,妈妈买。
大家都觉得这是理所应当的,儿子是我生的,我怨谁呀?
还是我儿疼我。
这世界上,我唯一的亲人啊!
他说,不要讲妈妈!
在家里所有人责备我,你为什么不把东西收好,你为什么不自己注意,你怪谁的时候,只有我儿子挺身而出为娘争辩,他大叫着,一只手插腰,另一只手拦在前面做阻止状,大叫着说:“啊!!!!!不要讲妈妈!”
什么世道,唉。
“不要讲妈妈”上的88条回复
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