为你做饭是因为我爱你
厨房传来煲牛尾的香味儿,我在客厅看着电视擀馄饨皮。电视里在转播马术比赛,肯定是看不懂的,就图个有声音,不显得诺大的客厅太寂寞。
这根擀面杖是我为擀面条馄饨皮而特地买的,又长又粗,从很远的中国城背回来,因为你说你很想吃手擀面。“外面的面条碱味儿太重。”
我不是做面食的好手。以前不是。
其实,以前我什么都不是。我在嫁给你以前,不知道洗衣服要分内外,不知道领口要泡要揉。你娘说看我拿剪刀的姿势都别扭,在你娘指导下做出的第一道菜是凉拌豆腐—–味精还搁多了,你娘掂着手指尖从里面望外沾。
而今,我很轻易地为你做出所有你叫得出名字的菜,很多菜你在饭店里吃过一遍赞不绝口,第二天我就能比照着做出。无他,因为,我爱你,喜欢看你满头是汗地在电视机前的茶几旁狼吞虎咽。我于是感觉幸福。
昨夜,我在网上一路闲逛,天光将明时才迈着猫步,脱得光光地依偎在你身边。迷迷糊糊中,你说的第一句话是:“这里没有你的枕头。”是的,我们已经分居很久,当然不是完全意义上的分居。我睡眠太浅,两个人的作息又不相同,你的鼾声造成我神经短路。总是很羡慕你妈妈说的,没你爸爸打雷一样的鼻息相伴,她无法入眠,忍不住问了一句:“这样的适应过程要多久?”
你说:“这里没有你的枕头。”都睡成那样了,还心里装着我。枕着你的胳膊说,没关系,我就睡你手上好了。
你低头,吻了吻我。
黑夜里,辨不清位置。你吻在我的鼻侧。
心中感动。你好久不主动吻我了,有意无意地,在多次抗议你吸烟以后口气太重,令我不想亲你。于是,你下意识里开始逃避吻我。
梦里,你很放松。很自然地,你轻吻一下,表达了你爱我。还是你身上的气息,却变得好闻,如露珠中的小草般清新的体味,还有淡淡的烟草香,男人味很浓厚。
赶紧回吻一下,在你的下巴上。
你再吻我,耳朵。
我再回吻你,低头在你胸口啄了一啄。
于是。。。。。。。。。。。。我的叫声穿过黑夜的墙壁,时高时低,辉映着窗外野猫的悸动。你很狂野,借着夜幕的遮掩,白天的文雅一丝不见。我喜欢。
很抱歉打扰了你沉沉的睡眠,而你早上还要见老板。
临走前,你轻手轻脚地换衣,路过我身边的时候长久地看我一眼。我知道,只是假装不见。
你一走我就起来了,带着愉悦的心情直奔菜场,拎了大包小袋回来做饭。听说牛尾对男人很补的,还有,你上次说上海的菜肉馄饨令你怀念。
锅上炖着牛尾,菜馅不咸不淡,我止不住嘴角的微笑,等你回来大喊:“好香啊!”
你一顿饭只吃10分钟,看不见背后我一个早上的汗。为你做饭,因为我爱你。
(08/21/2004 : 01:54:17 AM 于《草堂》)
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