我又在乱讲
把日子安排得忙忙碌碌。尽量拖延着不回家。
我打算戒网,在电脑前坐得太久,除了右手食指以前写字磨出的老茧掉了以外,其他都是大恶,比方说,小肚子隆起,比方说得了干眼症,比方说边写文章边吃饼干,吸引很多蚂蚁在我抽屉里做窝,比方说,没事的时候想你。
晚上去上课,学生问,你为什么不回答我?我说什么?他说,我MSN你,你不理睬我。我疑惑着恍如梦游,说,我难道MSN没有关?他说是的,一直开着。从昨天到现在。
我竟然没有发觉,也许潜意识里,我故意,让自己一直亮着,无论你什么时候上线都可以一眼看见我的等候。尽管也许我睡了,尽管也许我不在。也许冥冥的潜意识里,我期待自己一推开门,看见屏幕底端一个深蓝色的MESSAGE一闪一闪,尽管,我知道这是自己无望的期盼。
相聚是为了长久的思念,快乐是点燃痛苦的药捻。一遍又一遍播放HOTEL CALIFONIA,哀伤象滴水的屋顶沿着心中的墙角蔓延,不一会就湿了一大片。
我知道很多故事最后都结尾在无言。我是那样胆怯,不敢多说一句,不敢告诉你我心中的怨。我想,我是那个习惯于忍耐的人,无论上苍给我什么,我都会下咽。
我又在乱讲了,在这原本属于你我的深夜。
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