Fresh from my shower, I stand in front of the mirror complaining to
my husband that my breasts are too small. Instead of characteristically
telling me it's not so, he uncharacteristically comes up with a
suggestion...
'If you want your breasts to grow, then every day take a piece of
toilet paper and rub it between them for a few seconds.'
Willing to try anything, I fetch a piece of toilet paper and
stand in front of the mirror, rubbing it between my breasts.
'How long will this take?' I asked.
They will grow larger over a period of years,' my husband
replies.
I stopped. 'Do you really think rubbing a piece of toilet paper
between my breasts every day will make my breasts larger over the years?'
Without missing a beat he says 'Worked for your butt, didn't
it?'
He's still alive, and with a great deal of therapy, he may even
walk again, although he will probably continue to take his meals
through a straw.
Stupid, stupid man.