牌友亮子
无聊的时候就去联众打保皇。
我是在战斗中成长起来的。刚开始打得极臭,总是输,没人跟我玩。后来用老公的号去练,把他的号也给打臭了。劳工又用我的名字重新注册了一个,他用我的号玩,分疯涨。总见他老谋深算地蛰伏在牌场里一动不动,单等腿子暴露了,或皇帝要跑的时候给予致命一击,眼看着皇帝就剩一张牌可怜地趴在窝里飞不出去。
这种牌在山东很流行。一进那牌室,别人张口问你是哪里人,你若回答是安徽的,别人都吃一惊。因为通常的答案都是“济南,青岛,德州,烟台“等地方。五人一桌,有张大鬼长得与众不同,画成权仗的样子,拿了这张的人便是皇帝,另一张小鬼长得也特别,是个小宝剑,拿了那张就是侍卫,这两人一家,剩下三个贫民对这两人围追堵截,狂轰烂炸。
劳工用我的名字注册的号,因此他在屏幕上显示的是一个娇娃。但他的毒辣风格和深藏不露的打法,一看就是个久经沙场的杀手。
我是在他积累了丰厚的财产,官阶已经晋升到军门官的时候才开始败家的。败家的意思是,我还是常败将军,只因财产丰厚,输几把不影响大局。
我技术不怎么样,但有一个特性跟随我多年却一直不改,并以此而著名——-话多。我可以边抽牌边打字,字打得比发牌快,经常因为灌水过多而被禁言60秒,最多一次被禁180秒。那180秒真难熬,感觉被束缚了手脚,被袜子塞住了喉咙,被毛巾堵住了鼻子,被人用手掐住了喉咙。那一刻,功力尽丧,不过因为特别安静,大脑才在手停顿以后发挥了功效,思考很缜密,那三分钟里我还赢了。
后来,我碰到了亮子。
亮子不多言,在我长篇大论的时候,他只半天敲一个字:“笑”。他就那么偶尔一笑,让我一切尽被他收入眼底。
亮子习惯坐我的上手,然后喂牌给我,总是输送的弹药恰如其分,我需要单他就放单,我需要双他就放双,我需要他不上牌让我过小,他就跟看到我牌似的PASS了。两个人的默契让我觉得很舒服,心情舒畅。因为有他长心替我算牌,我于是更肆无忌惮地开始打字,大部分时间都在说话,对其余几个牌友评头论足,说我下家是个愣头青,一定是个十几岁的半大小伙,火气极旺,只图一时盖过他人的快意,全然不顾全局。“配合,联邦的配合,是打牌之本。”我经常发表那些看似高屋建瓴的总结性发言。其实,我压根不懂得配合,我现在常尝胜果,完全是因为有亮子在配合我。
有些人做理论,有些人做实践。我是理论家,而亮子是实践者。
再后来,我打牌只为亮子。登录上去看看,如果亮子不在,我就退了。原因是,偶尔自己去打,总是憋一肚子气回来,不是被人阻击在家里,就是联邦之间因不熟悉而相互撕杀。亮子一来,我完全变成了另一个人,打牌勇猛,战无不胜。那种扬眉吐气,那种对敌人的痛扁,那种在他的护驾之下我俨然是一个傲视天下的帝王的感觉,真好!恍惚间,因为常胜着,我于是有种错觉,自己真打得不错。
这种错觉总在亮子不在的时候被他人毫不留情地践踏。我孤家寡人的时候,经常被打得翻不过身来,苟延残喘,甚至在胜利在望的时候被人一脚踏扁,严重损伤我的骄傲。
我于是开始将信心,热情,胜利的喜悦以及依赖,统统交给一个我甚至不知道模样的男人手里。而他的名字一出现,我就开始焕发光彩。
然后,我哭笑不得地发现,我居然因为几张甚至没有手感的扑克牌而开始了网恋。一有空就登录到联众,偷偷看一眼那个男人在不在。一旦他在,我便不顾一切地坐下来尽兴,最过分的一次曾经奋战到半夜四点。两个人都忘记了第二天分别都要上班。
我还不至于神经,也就是说,我很清醒地知道,我喜欢这男人,只因为在牌上的默契。我是那种纯粹理智性的女人,那种绝对不会跟人私奔,绝对不会因为某男的迷魂汤而神魂颠倒,绝对不会因为爱上一个男人而放弃整个世界。想想,满悲哀的。一个人,一生都不曾为什么癫狂过,以至于忘记一切,任何时间都活得很明白。
以前在酒桌上就这样,喝得越多越清醒,眼看着周围的人一个个瘫软下来,甚至是不可一世,自以为了不起的老总,都钻到酒桌下面,然后对着一瘫瘫的烂泥冷笑,暗说,在酒桌上,剥你个裸体。尽管明天一早你又把皮披上了。
于是,我在牌桌上极尽风情,或喊“亮亮”或喊”宝宝“,宝宝是我的发明创造。通常人喊腿子为”保子“我认为这个词太过刚硬,没有一点感情色彩在里面。既然曾经一刻我是皇帝,我就要非常爱护我的保子,我要腻称他为”宝宝“。我会在牌桌上兰花指轻翘,边嗑着瓜子,边娇滴滴地喊:“我的宝宝呢?”亮亮便低头叩首,单膝跪地,应声道:“在。”
而后来就一发不可收拾。
终于有一天,在我打着哈欠,揉着眼睛,依依不舍地第N次告退说“这次我真的要离去了,我快累死在牌桌上”的时候,一直寡言的从不披露情感的亮子突然就攥住了我的手,很坚毅地问:“你电话?我要给你打电话。”
我突然就楞住了,不晓得怎么回答。感觉象是漫画书里的人物突然迈过薄薄的纸张站在了你的面前。
我说,我在国外,电话很贵的。算了吧。
然后,我就不再去打牌了。
然后,在这几天的假日里,我很无聊。
网上已经没人了。大家都与家团圆热热闹闹。
我翻开这个网页也没人,翻开那个网页也没什么新闻。
我哪里都去,就是不敢上牌室。
根绝我对自己的了解,没几天后,我就都忘了。
甚至忘记他叫亮子。
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