第十章:同志,你要记住
这个故事后面的花絮是,王贵每次回系里开大会的时候,都努力避开小芳那水汪汪,欲语还休的眼睛。他有时候正在走廊上跟其他老师站着聊天,只要看见小芳远远过来,就赶紧找借口躲开。他知道自己这样做很没有气概,本该给小芳个理由,可他又实在不知道该说什么。王贵一句话都不留的态度,促使小芳下定决心参加系里的出国选拔。很快,她就如愿待发了。
在系里的欢送聚餐过后,小芳主动走到王贵面前,大大方方地说,老领导,我要走了,你送送我,以后难得见面了。王贵无声随着小芳迈向以前常走的路上。他心中有千言万语,却不知道该如何开口。他很想象个大哥哥或老领导那样嘱咐小芳两句,一个人出门在外,凡事要小心,有什么困难了都要靠你自己。可他就是固执着张不了口,他觉得那样似乎太虚伪。
到了小芳宿舍楼的楼下,小芳突然叹口气,冲王贵很柔和地笑笑,说:“我就要走了,你都没什么话跟我说?要不,上去坐坐?”王贵的心真的咯噔一下,有如以后陪孩子坐海盗船那样悬空着没有着落,说不清是激动是感慨还是难受。“不了,你那还有别的同志,太晚了不方便。”王贵脱口而出。“同屋的早搬走了,现在就我一个人。”小芳这话叫王贵更加心惶惶,搞不清楚是真的客套呢,还是有别的意味,上去了,会怎样?
王贵站着懵懂了只一分钟,就果断说了句:“不了,你多保重。家里老婆孩子还等我回呢!”然后转身毅然投入夜幕的黑色。
王贵这段经历原本是不为人所知的,在王贵过了N年以后,彻底心上没负担了,某天跟安娜聊天就说起了这夜的故事。“她叫我上去坐坐,想想我就没去。”王贵说。安娜居然笑了,拍着王贵的脑门说:“后悔了吧?想得肠子都悔歪了吧?你这个人也真是,怎么这样伤人家的心?不就去坐坐吗?我看你是心里有鬼,不然坐坐怕什么?”安娜是个奇怪的女人,若是王贵掖着囊着,藏五藏六不说实话,安娜就气到发狂,认定是有什么;若是王贵自己说出来,她倒觉得没什么了。“我就是想要他句实话。爱就爱了,什么大不了的?人是感情动物,哪就能一辈子没有波折?爱了就要承认,敢做敢当。我就从不隐瞒,我爱别人了我就说出来!不说,才有鬼呢!”安娜指的是她后来的那段差点要了她命的婚外情。这家也真邪了,王贵其实是段若有若无的事情,竟时不时挂在安娜嘴上,安娜差点都给人带到美国去,王贵却从不提起。安娜的故事,都安娜自己说。
“你瞎说什么啊?根本没有的事,你就喜欢造谣。都是同事,传出去还真以为有什么了呢!”王贵坚持一辈子都是,没有。“我这个人在感情上,最忠诚了,从不跟人家瞎来。”王贵一直这样标榜自己。直到我后来大了有了男朋友,回家跟父母抱怨他跟其他女人亲近,骑车带别的女孩给我抓到的时候,王贵意味深长地告诉我男朋友:“同志,你要记住!这种事情,不捉奸在床,你就咬死两个字:没有。打死都不能承认。你不承认,她也就是怀疑,瞎闹闹,你一承认,这一辈子就完啦!”一句话惊醒梦中人,我男朋友受益匪浅,他小心翼翼地问王贵:“叔叔,这是你经验之谈吧?”
安娜听这话不乐意了,伸头过来质问王贵,还当着我们孩子的面儿,揪着他耳朵说:“你这话是什么意思?搞了半天,你还是骗了我一辈子,到死没个实话,你说!你到底有没有?!。。。。。。”“没有,你瞎说什么呀,就是没有。”王贵抱着头死不承认,很有点怕死不是共产党员的风范。
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